Ghost Dance Revival

Is this the revival of the Ghost Dance?
Is this what they wanted?

Something hurts here
Layers and layers of pain
That reach through me
Beyond me into something older

The blood doesn’t dry when it’s in the ground
No, it just seeps up to lie under the dirt when it rains
The land will always be parched
It will always hurt with scabs along the rivers

Sometimes when I blink I see its outline
This pain is just beyond my reach
And when I open my eyes there still nothing there
But the stench of iron from old dried blood

Is this the revival of the Ghost Dance?
Is this what they wanted?

Sometimes my chest hurts when I breathe
A hand reaching in to pull out my lungs
And make me feel an ancient panic
Until I fall to my knees in prayer

My legs get scraped and I bleed
Straight from my heart to the shriveled dirt
My blood mixing with the old lava
That burns in the hearts of their descendants

And this land cries back to me
It tells me that my blood is from elsewhere
I wonder if my penance is enough
Or if my remembering is not enough

Is this the revival of the Ghost Dance?
Is this what they wanted?

Sometimes I don’t even know I’m crying
Until my tears mix with the salt of the dirt
And a breeze welcomes me with relief
With a salve for my longing

I am learning to love this place
Enough to feel its history undulate
Through me
Beyond me

I will learn to love the pain of this place
And feel it tear holes in my heart
Weaving through my lungs
So that this land can heal me

Is this the revival of the Ghost Dance?
Is this what they wanted?

They are still alive to me
In my visions they visit me
They chase me and they beat me
These ghosts will not be buried

I wonder if I am dead to my homeland
The earth there does not know me
But I am dead somewhere
So I can live here in shame

My blood is from elsewhere
But I am bleeding here
And I will let my pain rest here
With your pain

Is this the revival of the Ghost Dance?
Is this what they wanted?

Comments: This is a piece of me stepping outside of myself - and into the body of a white man. It was odd. It is also the capstone piece to a longer compilation - which I may or may not post right now. It still needs some work.